Sunday, February 1, 2009

A Solitary Disposition.

"And maybe we will do this for the rest of our lives; maybe we will live forever. And maybe we don't have to think it's right, and maybe we will. I don't feel what you feel, I don't want to feel this incomplete. No one here can tell me how to fill this space between. Everyone knows you're my one regret; everyone knows you're my one weakness." ~The Last Goodnight.

I don't want to feel this incomplete.

We all want to be accepted, to be loved by others. But sometimes we don't; sometimes we just want to be alone, to sit in a corner of a dark room and just think. About nothing, or something very profound. Or we want to be in that room, listen to extremely sad songs and just cry, to let everything out that we have been holding in for so long.

Sometimes we have no one to be there for us. And other times we do, but they don't understand. Their kind words just can't comfort you because they don't fully understand you. They can't feel your pain because they haven't experienced it yet. And you hope that one day you find that perfect person that you know you can tell everything to. Who really and truly understands. Someone who is always there for you and will never let you down.

You can never know if they are the one until you take that leap and finally trust them with everything you've been holding in for so long. But you just have to believe, and hope and pray that they really are there for you. Because he is out there, whether you know it or not. And he will find you, one day, before it's too late.



*Note: I wrote this yesterday but I never had a chance to post it. :)*

19 comment(s):

Anonymous said...

the real problem with people is that before they really understand others they feel that they are bad. Actuall, if we feel grateful and happy for others, we will be more happier.
While, just as you said, sometimes we just want to be alone, heart needs rest after wondering around, may be, that's the reason.

James said...

I like this. We just have to trust that we can find that one person who will always help us, always do what is right for us, to put the other person before themselves. I love this. It is so true. I know how i feel so alone a lot of the time. Just understand, if you ever need to talk I am always here. Also, thanks for your thoughtful comment.

lone poet said...

you, you YOU
YOU YOU YOU!!!!!!!!!!

lone poet said...


lone poet said...

holy shit that made me cry vikki.

Allison said...

yea i get what your saying.

lone poet said...

3 years vikki, almost 4, how can i not? its been hard. you know it, i still have that fear he'll find me...

krl said...

im very confused. what is all of this about?

i know you're a girl. and what the heck was taylor rambling on about.

school. first day. terrible.


krl said...

meet me on gmail.


•waLkiиg disasteя• said...

i simply love the quote u hav put down here!!tho its pretty confusing.....

lone poet said...

it has everything to do about averything, as you know already. you know what goes through my head better than almost everybody. so you probly know EXACTLY what it meant, b4 u asked. and thats good, because now you know, if i die, i die, if i live i live. no differene to me. i've been there, and attempted it more than once, it isnt a big deal to me. but even b4 ubh, i was happy sometimes, now, mainly i think because tyler hates me so much, i'm not happy, ever, even at rodeo practice today, it was weird. and its stupid, i have no reason to be unhappy.

lone poet said...

he wasnt always like that. you refuse to recognize the kind, sweet, LOVEABLE side of him. he could be really sweet. if i was every nervous about something... he could calm me down... i really love him still, i really do. of coarse, it hurt alot, the things he said, worse than a girl pms ing
but he is the first guy i've ever felt that way about. you know how i didnt think he was attractive at all in the start, well that just made me fall for him more when he proved that he was really nice, and now i really do think hes adorable, cute, ya know. he couls be so perfect... god, this is a very bad place to be saying all this stuff.

Cursed♪♫ said...

it seems like you've had a peep into my heart and you've said the things i've been thinking in my mind. The picture you've posted, is so much like me ! I love the quote too !

krl said...

i just dont see the point in living. im doing nobody any good. were born. we go to school for years for a job that we'll receive, learn to hate then retire with no money when you are too old to do anything. where is the point in that, really?

though, i really am surprised how much r.e.m.'s philosophies and 'everybody hurts' has helped.

music class in my new school is infantile and pathetic. we learn the very basics. and the whole class revolves around christian rock and choir (which im compulsory to sing in - im sure you can imagine the types of words that went through my head when i heard this. i was actually told off several times by the teacher for frowning.)

ive decided to leave the class for three reasons;

1. the above
2. doesnt offer computer music as an instrument
3. not worth my time nor the money

im going to try for i.c.t. tomorrow as a class exchange.


krl said...

cursed/beautifully broken still comments you? we both know what we are thinking.


grey~eyes said...

that was such a beautiful post.
It really was :)



(im kinda in awe, sorry)

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